She's Satisfied
by Theadle
Summary: GIFTFIC oneshot for Foxy'sGirl - Astrid is a soldier just come off from duty, and Hiccup wants to make sure this time is absolutely perfect for her.


+++Hello Ladies and Gents, I just wanted to give a quick apology for the lack of editing in this. I'm just really pumped that I finally wrote this for Foxy'sGirl and I couldn't wait to post it. This is probably a mine-field of errors which I hope don't annoy too much, but I do planning on coming back shortly and tidying up. Foxy'sGirl is a fantastic writer who has written some wonderful stories, so I thought I'd have some and make some shameless smut. God bless the internet.+++

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I waited for a little while in the car with my head back, acting like I was sleeping just for some superficial that I wasn't the most awkward lonely human being in the world. I got the text and drove over to the terminal where she already was. She didn't like me being there in the baggage pickup for her, when I asked she said she hated me having to get out of the car. I knew she just hated people staring. She threw her bags in the boot and threw herself into the front seat, immediately turning to me and bringing her hands up to rub her fingers against my cheeks, which held my dastardly carefully-maintained stubble. Lady Haddock loves the stubbs.

"Still?" she asked. I chuckled and brought her in for a kiss.

"Yea."

"Must've been that compliment I made then. You really can't get enough of those, huh?"

"Nope, I'm like a cat. Just keep petting me until your arm falls off and then I expect by that time you'll have freed up your other hand to take over."

"Speaking of idiotic animals, how's Toothless?"

"You'll see him, he's getting on well but it won't seem like it when he sees you."

"Hah, I can't wait."

As it was, it was difficult for me to drive enough without her prodding me for things I've been doing while she was gone. During her several tours, we'd gone through a stream of fights about why exactly I never got out. I liked to stay in the shop and work - which basically meant I would be in a daze for something like three days at a time. When I'd finally come out of it, I'd have all but finished a project at the expense of my health. I'd be starving from eating nothing but little snacks, under-showered, and extremely tired. In retrospect, I'd built a firm off the success of a few great inventions. I had my own shop and I dictated my own hours. And by 'have my own shop' I mean a hollowed ground on which every solitary intern would pick their nose and rub their fingers off on my bench afterwards.

This girl couldn't seem to understand how lucky I actually was to have her. I had literally no social life outside of Gobber and a couple other guys on the team. They laughed at the occasional joke I made, but I couldn't for the life of me force myself to hold a conversation with any of them about sexting or whatever the hell it was they were interested in. I am lucky to ever have come into contact with Astrid Hofferson. After all, she gave me the confidence to build my company in the first place. When we pulled up the driveway, I could already see Toothless' form jiggling in the window next to the door. As he saw Astrid, he only intensified his wiggling to extreme levels, jumping and barking and generally not knowing how to handle himself.

We walked into the house - she insisted I help her carry nothing. Toothless yelped and cried - I knew he'd be barking until we gave him the obligatory treat.

"Jesus, Hiccup." She said, taking note of the living room.

"What?"

"All you've done is collect more crap."

I shrugged, knowing she would start cleaning all the boxes over the next few days and I'd help because I couldn't do much of anything else to look like a useful husband. "Well I have some more crap for you."

"Huh?"

She swept her arm over the dining table, tossing all the little screws and junk off knowing I wouldn't care; and she slammed down her duffle. I stood shock a little at how the thing sounded heavy enough to break the thick slab of oak I'd made the table from. Jesus, she must have gotten even more muscle during this tour. I came around to see her taking a hard case out of the bag, and I became more excited than I should have been. I looked up at her and our eyes locked - she knew me well enough to know I was getting a hard on the longer she waited to open the damned case.

"So I see I missed the memo that you've done another round of PT."

"I'll tell you the story behind that in a little. For now," she paused as she took the final two latched off the case, "take a gander at this."

She flipped open the case and I was so excited I squealed.

"No! NO NO! HOW!?" I yelled as she fell back laughing against the couch. I hobbled over and pushed her over the back so we both slipped over to a more comfortable position. "Hey, not yet you nee-" I stopped her, ravaging her mouth with as much affection as I could muster. "You. Are. Amazing."

"The requisition took a long time, but I contacted the right guy - he's a big fan of yours."

"Yea? Does he know how big a fan I am of yours?"

"Obviously. The stuff of legend."

We continued kissing - she flipped us over and ripped off her uniform. The moment I saw that and her braid come undone, I just about climaxed. I swear, it was the hottest thing I'd ever seen; followed by the least hot thing I can think of - she started pulling my clothes off. She kept her eyes locked with mine as she pulled off my shirt and started undoing my pants.

"Did you know, that I was secretly very happy when they said you'd lost your leg?"

There she goes into her spiel. I rolled my eyes to punctuate and she gave me this breathy grin. She pulled my pants down and started grinding.

" 'Cause fuck those other girls who'd started licking their chops at you when you finally had your growth spurt. They all looked at you like some poor unfortunate cripple when you got this, but I know the truth."

"Yea? What's that?"

"None of them actually cared about you. They thought you were some cute nerd who wasn't worth a second look. They were all so blind. Gods, if only they knew."

"Way to pump up the self-est-" She threw her hand over my mouth, and her eyes were closed as she continued grinding - the both of us heavy rather heavily by this point.

"Thank GOD for Haddock genes, Hiccup. None of those bitches ... know they missed the full package. You are the most ... considerate, kind, smart, selfless, patient man I have ever met - you put up with my shit and act like it's nothing, honestly I would've divorced me by now."

"And miss this? Sorry, but verbal putdown sessions and boiling-hot sex are worth the wait."

"'m sorry." She said between kisses.

"Fer mwat?" When she didn't answer, I stopped her grinding and kissing and just looked at her. I was just about to die with everything she was giving me.

"How can you be sorry when I'm the one who..." I couldn't find an end to that sentence. I just stared and stroked her hair. She hardened her eyes an growled a little, getting up. "This time." She pulled down her pants and exposed her entire body. I loathed in the same breath as I swelled with pride to think of how many men had probably tried to get at her, but of course she was always too smart for them. She's too smart for me, quite frankly. Gave me a steady advantage if I ever put myself in a bad situation with another explosive - wouldn't want to lose both legs.

She bent over the couch and waited. "Why don't you show me how much your poor pride is hurt and actually fuck me for once?"

I smirked at the challenge - knowing she was just ruffling my feathers like she always did. I brought a hand up her back and leaning down so we were against each other. That was when I remembered that I had a speech prepared for this.

"I want to be different. I know you don't like that I'm ... not living a life. I want to make it different. I want to be your everything. I want you to come home and have a place where there isn't anything to worry about. I want people to be as jealous of you as they are of me. I want to be someone you're proud to share your life with." She smiled and chuckled, grinding back against me. "You know I don't care who's jealous of either of us, right? I just don't want to ... leave you alone and then you have nothing else, you know?"

I thought about it for a moment, but I had some semblance of concentration from where I was. "No, I want them to envy us. I'm going to stop them from looking at me and thinking how pitiful our marriage must be. Not gonna happen."

She turned more to look at me out of the edge of her eye, leveling me with an intense look of understanding. "You want it, then fucking make it happen. And when the day comes that somebody has the balls to tell me how hot they think you've become, I'll gladly punch them out and tell you about it while you're banging me into the carpet. Now fucking put it in."

I did, going along slowly and relishing that first-time feeling. I'd bring myself in and draw out, doing what the book said and emphasizing movement against her clit. I concentrated on fingering her as gently as I could manage, carefully doing movements I had read about. I jolted out of my daze when she growled loudly.

"No, come on Hiccup. Let me feel your damn length." She stopped me and moved so I drew all the way out, and then slammed back into me. We both moaned loud at that. I met her thrust by thrust, not able to control myself any longer. I grabbed her thigh and she let me draw out, immediately flipping over and swallowing me whole. As I came, I just started laughing. I felt her chuckle a little and as she drew back from cleaning me off, she asked about it.

"It's like a joke that never gets old. How can anybody want to cheat on you when you're the most ... sorry, this is so cliché..."

"No, go on. It's been a while since anybody's given me an actual compliment." She smirked, leaned back against the armrest with her legs spread wide open. I looked at her and twisted my head away in embarrassment. I always marveled at how comfortable she was with herself. She unconsciously made me more willing to be myself by virtue of how adventurous and careless she was. But she could be so gentle and tender in her feelings - her ability to understand where others were coming from just amazed me. She could point out another person's BS so accurately they literally became paralyzed and in the same moment know exactly how to comfort someone with earnest words that seemed to bring this surge of strength through you.

"Perfect."

Her leg came and she threw it across my lap. I stroked a hand along her calf, marveling at how even at rest I could feel her heartbeat clear through the skin - her blood pumping so freely and powerfully through her skin that it felt like a river under there.

"You are absolutely stunning, in every way. There's really no other way to put it, I'm about as bad as Toothless - just wandering around the house and waiting for you to get back. It's worth it though, to see you like this. It's worth it, because I wouldn't be here without you."

I looked at her and she had this little smile on her face. She drew her leg back. "Go look at your present."

I got up slowly and hobbled over to Toothless on the table licking the muzzle stopper of an Cheytac M300. This thing had a few mods meant more for accuracy rather than facilitating more rounds. Obviously, she would never actually use this in her kind of battle situations, but in her infinite wisdom she understood to simply give me a machine with the greatest of quantitive capacities and let me do the rest.

"Did you tell them I'd send it back with 185% range and as quiet as a sneeze?"

I felt a chin rest on my shoulder, and I barely flinched already knowing it was just her. I'd gotten much better at handling the end result of her stealth training.

"mhmm."

"How'd you know I was interested in this model?"

"I looked through your search history."

"Astrid! We talked about that!"

"Yea we did, but I needed to find you a present. What do you want to eat?"

"Oh no." Is all she heard before a series squeaks and clacks told her I was coming towards her. She felt my arms loop around her and hold her close, a mouth coming to her ear.

"I'm not done yet, go and sit down. I've made plans for dinner." She could feel me already good for a second round, and that in combination with my husky commanding tone made her about as horny as she'd ever been to be sure. Only I could do that to her - the thought giving me a swell of pride. She went and sat down, watching as I lifted a huge ribeye off a plate. Her eyes washed over with a small sense of glee, but because I'd been looking for it, I noticed and grinned evilly. I had her.

"Maybe you weren't listening, but I said I wanted to be your everything. You want to know where I got this?"

She bobbed her head up and down, looking like a dog in front of a fatty bone with her eyes just a little wider. I held the steak out to her and as anticipated she put her face against it, inhaling deeply. She breathed out and looked straight at me with knowing eyes. I leaned down until our foreheads were touching.

"That's right, Snot and I coordinated so I'd pick this bad boy fresh off the chopping table three hours before your landing. But then you know what I did - I called him back and asked if he could order something special, so he did. You want to know where this meat came from?"

I paused for a moment, waiting as she gradually realized exactly where I was going with this. "No."

"Yes."

"I would've smelt it!"

"No you wouldn't. the difference doesn't show until you cook it."

This beef had been delivered by a farmer to Snotlout's butcher from chain of farmlands owned by our mutual schoolmate, Fishlegs. Through chemically enhancing the feed given to the cows daily with a special formula he'd adopted from his grandfather, he had enormously enhanced the potency of the flavor in the beef as well as the way the fat reacts to heat, allowing for every ounce of juice to simply absorb into the beef while cooking - if you cooked it right.

"Fishlegs personally trained me on how to cook it." I turned back to walk to the stove, lighting fire under a pan I'd already put there. "You're getting that and noodles with mushrooms and cream sauce," I turned to Astrid, who looked rather ready for that second round, "How's that?"

"I think you should turn that stove off and put away that steak, because there's nothing I can do to hold myself back if you don't."

I shrugged, reversing what I'd already done and stowing the steak in the fridge - it wasn't to room temperature yet anyhow. The moment I turned around, Astrid was on me. I hefted myself onto the counter and she straddled me. I fondled her some more, suckling her tits and letting her slam down as hard as she wanted until once more I grabbed her thigh, unable to speak of course. She ground into me the rest of the way, and I sat confused. I didn't want us to make a mess, at least not here. After I'd finished, she crouched down and licked everything off my stomach. I growled in anger.

"Astrid."

"mmm?"

"Come here." I hopped off the counter and crouched down carefully so her pussy was right in my face. I began doing everything step by step, starting out slow like the book had said and inserting more fingers along the way, gradually feeling more confident with the feedback she was giving me. She began moaning loudly, holding my head and propping a leg up on a stool. I chuckled as she became more demanding, sandwiching my head between her and the drawers so I could barely move. When I did get to look up, all I could see were her breasts. She had her head keeled back while she tore out several loud moans. I noticed a couple particular things she liked, and mixing those things with other tactics the books had told me her moans got louder and louder until she was really just screaming. Her head came down a few times and I got to see her expression - it was pure awesome. I got hard just watching her, and somehow she seemed to sense that when she pulled back, standing me up and bending over the counter.

"Come on you schoolboy fucker, show me what you got."

I smirked evilly, propping my bad leg on the stool and using my good one to slowly draw into her, but she'd have none of it. She smacked right back into me and kept doing it, not caring if I was keeping pace. I ran my hands around her and whispered into her ear how amazing I thought she was. She arched up to kiss me from my position over her shoulder, but I didn't stop. I told her about how hot I thought she was when I first met her, and how every day when she was practicing basketball in secondary school, I would have to hide how aroused I was, how her gorgeous thighs would flex and flow with the massive muscles underneath. How her face looked so hot without anything on it but sweat, and that gave me an idea. In my last few moments of sanity, I flipped her over and immediately pounded back into her, fondling her some more and staring at her, telling her that I'd sooner kill the competition than let anybody else see that face. Yes, that one you make when you're just about to...

I almost forgot to pull out, but I did and jacked myself off. Afterwards, she opened her eyes, and started wiping the cum off her chest and licking it up. She let her head drop back, totally spent. I heard her whisper over and over the same thing in endless streams like a river,

"I love you."

She continually said it even though she could barely breathe. I kissed slowly up her chest and I felt her hand resting on my abdomen, stroking gently.

"God, I love you Hiccup. Oh my god."

I chuckled darkly. "You aren't going to let me sleep are you."

"After ... that? Hell fucking no."

I stayed there for another minute, ready to go to sleep but knowing there was a long night ahead of us. I turned the stove back on and got the steak out.

"We really need to work on your endurance there if this is going to work." I heard her say from behind me.

"Just don't tell anybody what you just said ever and I'll make the effort, not like we won't have time." I was really dehydrated, and I realized Astrid must be too. I got us both water as I put ... two tablespoons of butter on the pan.

"Here." I rubbed the water bottle against her cheek. She accepted deftly and I went back to work. I had everything on a little paper, and it called for a hell of a lot of attention to timing. I concentrated in hopes I'd finally get it right. During training Fishlegs had excitedly nodded his head after my having obviously failed several times. He was obviously just doing that to show how happy he was that I'd finally stepped into the ballpark of where I needed to be, and he didn't restrain that bit of criticism either.

"That's good, you're finally cooking it so it will come out decently. Now you need to actually start putting everything on at the right time and we'll be on our way!"

Easy for you to say, Mr. Michelin-Star virtuoso.

Half way through cooking, I broke my bubble of concentration to look over at Astrid. She was, and boy did I get a kick outa this, still laying exactly how I'd left her.

"Astrid, honey- are you OK?"

"Just fine. You aren't planning on going anywhere tomorrow, right?"

"Uh ... no? Why?"

"Good."

I was very confused, but I didn't have time; the steak needed turning. I kept careful time with the watch I had on the counter - christ Fishlegs had to do this and eighty other things at the same time, how the hell could even seven people coordinate an effort so vast and clean? When I'd asked, Fishlegs just shrugged and pointed for me to put on more red wine vinegar.

Ah shit.

A few minutes later, I'd finished my little juggling act and gotten everything looking good on the plate. I had pan covers on the steaks and they were relaxing on the table. Only then did Astrid slide off the counter and wash herself off.

"And now we have to wait twelve minutes."

She immediately groaned loudly from the sink. "Seriously!? This had better be damned good or I'm going to collect a reward for my patience otherwise."

I would have laughed, but I realized that 'collecting a reward' was probably going to mean getting out some toys from that deep dark place in her closet. I was wallowing in fear until I realized something. She must be a mind-reader, I concluded. The look on her face when she turned around screamed demonic intent.

Before she cat-walked over, I had us placed at opposite sides of the table because I figured she'd want room, like always. Instead, she slid her place mat across the table and moved her chair extremely close to mine so they were about six inches from touching. She stepped over the chair and slid down, immediately resting her head on my shoulder.

"Did you want to hear the story about that PT?"

Teasingly, I brought the arm I had wrapped around her down to squeeze her bicep - only to go stalk still when it felt literally rock-solid. "Y-yeah."

"Well, it's pretty simple. The guys I was with knew my rep and still they decided that I wasn't up to snuff. New guys, mind you. The commander just loves his rotations. Anyway, these guys loved to sneak looks at me while we were washing up-"

She stopped when I tightened my grip and groaned very bitterly. I knew she smiled but I didn't care to look. I was too busy hating myself for not being there to fuck start every single moron who looked at her that way.

"Any-way, so I figured it's simple - the lieutenant is a big burly dude named Eret. He comes and hits on me while we're on base so I casually challenge him to an arm-wrestle. You know I don't have mass on my side, so he thought I was done for. Little does he know that I've been training daily for over a month. Little does he know that my pain threshold is what makes me a better soldier. So the whole company watching, I grab his hand about twice my size and in ten second I nearly break his knuckles slamming them into the table. Everybody was totally silent, even the other guys from the base. I got up on my chair and screamed 'If any of you fuckers want to try and take me, come and get me and you'll be lucky if you get to the hospital alive, you fucking get my drift?"

I laughed really hard, bringing her up for a kiss. I loved the fact that somehow I'd bagged the most badass girl in the world. Yea, I knew some other women who were really solid, but Astrid Haddock was the woman who literally roared. She could read you so well so fast that you didn't even get the opportunity to attack. She had a knack for killing, and she used it - but not without a cost. I looked into her eyes for a long time, so happy to see the warmth and humanity still there. I stroked her beautiful hair, marveling at how perfectly fit she looked from head to toe. "They didn't make you cut it?"

"The commander had a problem, but he never vocalized it. Nice thing about my position is nobody has time to fuck around with aesthetics. The chief told me it could be dangerous to have such obvious feminine traits in the field, I might become a first target. I just told him 'better me than them - I can take it.'"

"Astrid..."

"Hmm?" She already knew what I was going to say, but I'd say it anyway.

"I love you so much I can't handle it sometimes. I can't be there with you, although I'd sacrifice everything for the opportunity. I have to stay. Please don't put yourself so obviously out there. I know I can't stop you from being the first one through the door, but can you at least keep your head down to mask your weak points?"

"I can and will. I'm not stupid, just ambitious."

"Same thing when you're at war."

"What about you Mr. Gearhead? What're you thinking with the Cheytac?"

"Well I'm going to take it in to Gobber for consulting, since he's better at dissecting them and getting the right parts. What I need to do once I have it in pieces is see what is necessary and what isn't. At least for the prototype I can keep most everything - but I'll probably contract some machining for a new body and stock. The chassis is great, but there are a few tiny mistakes I think they made. And you know how I hate screws."

"Yes, your battle with seams in machinery."

"God, it's so stupid they can't create an organic path from one piece-!"

I stopped when I heard Astrid giggling. "I know I've said it a million times."

"It's fine."

"Wanna try your steak" I'd barely finished the sentence when Astrid groaned in agreement, jolting forward and taking the cover off, letting loose a pillar of steam. She closed her eyes when the smell hit her. God, it was intense from where I was.

"Oh god Hiccup, I'm going to fuck you so hard after this."

Well that's blunt, to be sure.

"I wish I could've been there for the arm wrestle."

"Yea, they said somebody recorded it but I never found out who." Cutting into her meat, she gushed. "Oh yes, rare and like butter." She stuffed a piece into her mouth with all the fat on it. She chewed and sat back. "Oh holy... oh shit." She closed her eyes.

"You aren't just flattering me, are you?"

"I had Kobe in goddamn Kobē when I was out the tour before last, you remember. Gods, how the fuck did you make this?!"

"Blood and tears and maybe just a little bit of tinkle - between you and me."

"Your secret's safe. Oh my ... fuck dude."

I started into mine and was very satisfied with the result. I liked mine medium, but if she wanted blood rare she was damn well gonna get it. She looked at mine and said with her mouth packed full, "UUUR, an amistercat!"

"A what?" I laughed.

"Ah, an aristocrat!"

She literally quoted that line every single time we ordered meat. Not only was it misquoted but I never took my steak medium rare, but she didn't care. She loved her mob movies.

We finished our plates off until we were fingering the sauce off. We settled for a few minutes, making the occasional comment and simply content that we were finally back together. I brushed the top of her hand resting on the table, and she turned it over so we could interlock fingers.

"So obviously you like it..."

"Damn straight."

"I'm planning on cooking some other stuff for you - I think you'll really like it."

"Well not right now."

"No, not righ-"

"'Cause we're going upstairs."

"Wha?" I jolted as she bent down to hoist me out of my seat. I held onto her - and finally I felt exactly how strong she was. I was clocking in at just under 12 stone, and she had just lifted me up like I was the cat. It was like being lifted up by a fork lift - no resistance or struggle what-soever. Her face held no strain at all. I couldn't help but gawk.

"You know something?" she said.

"Yea?"

"You are the greatest man I've ever met."

"Oh really?"

"Men usually look at life through the lens of being bored or sick with complacency, but you don't complain. You go out and you challenge yourself. You round out your sharp edges and strive to improve yourself - for me!"

"Yea, who else would I be doing it for? Speaking of improvements ... um..."

"Go on."

"I need to ... uh, build up some ... muscle."

She smiled at me warmly. "We'll need to start pumping calories into you and give you an actual regiment that fits your ... working stints. If you keep it up, by the end of my next tour you should be pretty well on your way." She looked thoughtful for a moment before licking her lips. I couldn't help but feel like I was in mortal danger.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because you with muscle is about the hottest thing I've ever imagined."

"I thought you had a pretty diverse imagination."

"Oh, no doubt..." She finished with a dark chuckle. She leaned down slightly to capture my lips - and I brought a hand over to rub her cheek as we did. I continued that gesture when we broke, a warm smile on both our faces. "And you know what?" She started.

"Hmm?"

"Once you get that muscle, you'll finally have the body to fit the package."

I realized what she meant just as I was about to say something - so all that came out was a squeak. I swallowed and tried again.

"H-how am I supposed to be a man when you keep doing that!?"

"What, using my wit to stay a few steps ahead of your total lack of social ability?"

"Well that's one way to put it."

"Yea, we're gonna improve that too. I don't care how biased you are."

"Jesus, so we're forming a list now? 'Things Hiccup Needs to Improve'; sounds like a mighty long list and since you're the only chance I've got at shrinking that list ... you'd better keep yourself alive."

"Oh don't worry about that, these pussies don't stand a damn chance. But we can start by crossing out one major bit."

"That is?"

"Endurance."

"Wha-WHAT. uuurrrrrggh" I buried my face into her shoulder as once more for the night, she had totally outwitted me into total embarrassment. Thank god she never made a big deal of it.

"Alright babe," she said, tossing me on the bed, "despite how much I'd love to keep chatting, we have some training to do. What do you say?"

I brought my arms from my face and after staring into her eyes gleaming off the moonlight for a moment, I brought my arms high above me and sighed.

"For you, always."

She seemed satisfied with that answer. And despite how often I didn't look like the kind of husband who'd do it for a world-class ball-breaker like Astrid, she always seemed like she was completely happy with the way things had turned out. As far as I was concerned, there was a God and he had given me just one thing in this life to make it all worth it.


End file.
